Last week Vegas got back on its feet ending Sunday with a huge win in the Cowboys vs Eagles game, which probably won them back their losses from week 9. Only 39% of the public bet on the Cowboys as seven-point underdogs, 23% bet on the Titans as 6.5- point underdogs, and just 29% bet on the Browns who all won outright. Plus, only 26% of the public bet on the Arizona Cardinals who covered a 16.5 point spread against the Chiefs. So with that, it has now reached a spot in the season where I am fading the fuck out of the public. Because Vegas always wins.
Still, with all the money Vegas ripped out of the hands of hardworking America taxpayers the Volk report was able to end the weekend ahead my scumbag bookie going 4-2 in my games. Let’s keep it rolling heading into week 11.
Dallas Cowboys vs. Atlanta Falcons (-3)
This is the biggest sucker bet of all time. The stagnant Dallas Cowboys are coming off of their only impressive win of the season against a banged up Eagles defense where Dak Prescott only managed a 56 quarterback rating. I don’t give a fuck what Jerry Jones or anyone says, Dak is a fucking bum. He cannot throw the ball downfield, and without Zeke, they would be the worst offense in the league. In last weeks win, Dak only had 83 more total yards than Zeke. I understand that the Falcons defense is depleted of assets, but they still have one of the most explosive offenses in the league, and in today’s modified NFL, an electric offense beats a gritty deffense ten times out of ten. Give me the Falcons by double digits 24-14.
LA Chargers vs. Denver Broncos (+7)
The Broncos and Chargers always play each other close, and while I believe the Chargers personnel is superior to the Broncos, we’re betting the number this week. Coming off a bye week after the Broncos lost heartbreakingly as Brandon Mangina missed a last minute 50-yard field goal in mile high stadium (bum). The Broncos still have that bad taste in their mouth, which has been sitting all through the bye week. This is a frisky Denver team with all-pro talent on the defensive and offensive lines; so I am taking the Broncos this week to keep it close with a final score of Chargers 23 Broncos 17.
Tennessee Titans vs. Indianapolis Colts (-1)
Another sucker bet! Everyone thinks the Titans are hot shit after beating the Cowboys and the Patriots in back to back weeks. Let’s not forget this is the same team that lost to the fricking Buffalo Bills! Andrew Luck is back to his old self, and with a strong offensive line, he can sit back there and surgically cut apart the Titans deffense. I think it will be close, but the Colts at home win this game.
Arizona Cardinals vs. Oakland Raiders (+5.5)
In what world should the Arizona Cardinals be 5.5 point favourites? This is a game that no one should ever bet, ever, but of course, I’m going to bet it because the Raiders are a fucking lead pipe lock getting 5.5 points against a team with the worst personnel in the league. Yes, the Raiders may have quit on Jon Gruden, but they still have superior talent on the offensive side of the ball against the Cardinals. This game is also the last winnable game of the Raiders season, and I hope they finally show up. I have been betting the Raiders all season hoping Gruden and Derek Carr finally figure it out, but they always find impressive new ways to screw up the game and lose. No shot I think they are capable of winning this game, but they sure as hell are not going to lose to by more than a field goal.
KC Chiefs vs. LA Rams (Over 63.5)
The first rule of sports gambling is that life is too damn short to bet the under and that rule could not be more applicable to this game. This is the type of over that we all covet every time it rolls around. I don’t need to go into detail about how electric either team’s offenses are, so all I will say is that both defenses will be lucky to get one stop. All we need is either team to put up at least 32 points. It may look on paper like a high over for NFL standards, but that is all relative. You are not going to want to be that asshole who bets the under Monday night.
Also, for good measure bet the Chiefs too, because just like the over, the Chiefs are not an offense you want to bet against. Hot Take: Despite the Rams have THREE former first-round draft picks on their defensive line, the Chiefs defense has produced comparable statistics, and in a game where one defensive stop could be the deciding factor I would take the Chiefs’ defense to make a stop against Jared Goff over the Rams to make a stop of Patty Mahomies.
Lastly, I will leave you with this: As the Sunday of week 11 inches closer and closer we are reminded that we only have seven more Sundays where we can sit back and watch seven hours of commercial-free NFL football. Whether you are up or down in your book, this is not the point of the season to become a coward. Let’s get this bread #DRIP
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